Time to Grow Up


Bill turns seventy years of age on the 23rd of this month. It is kind of freaks me out. My husband is seventy. I know it freaks him out even more than me. So, to cheer him up, Marcia (another VSO who lives upstairs) and I schemed to throw a big surprise party. The weekend of Feb 4th was a long weekend holiday in Sri Lanka; a perfect weekend to plan a party allowing our VSO colleagues from Colombo and Batticaloa to travel up for the party. We had a good showing and Bill was absolutely surprised and shocked that people were here for his birthday. He just thought that people were taking the long weekend opportunity to come up and see Jaffna, now that the road is open.
Now those of you who know Bill well know that he is a snoopy as they come. Nothing gets past his nose. I take something outside to the garbage bin; "What is that you have got there?" I put something into a drawer; "What did you just put away?" I come munching out of the kitchen; "What did you just eat?"
It is not suspicion. It is just plain so snoopy. Bill has never been able to sit still if there is mail in the mailbox. He has never been able to let a phone ring unanswered. He does not have the ability to set boundaries around his email inbox. So imagine, trying to plan a party right under his nose in his very own house.
The other issue that became apparent over this cloak and dagger surprise is that now, due to online banking; I can't spend a dime without him tracking it and me. Normally, I could care less about the fact that as I pull my car into the driveway, he announces to me,
"So you were at Reitman's and you stopped at Shoppers Drug Mart. What did you buy?"

Blowing out a fire of 70 candles - big job
Normally, I don't care, because he doesn't care what I spend, but when you are trying to be sneaky, it is a very big problem. In order to buy a surprise birthday present for him, I had to beg a loan from Marcia. I had to get a loan for groceries and alcohol for the party. Marcia had to purchase all the party favours and had to do all the shopping. Someone else had to arrange the cake, the food and the decorations.
He was impossible to get out of the house, so we had to resort to decorating her house (upstairs) for the party. Imagine trying to keep 20 people in the upstairs suite quiet as they decorated sipped wine and giggled.

sporting his new birthday duds - wife beater and sarong
That night Bill feasted on Cozy's Indian food and guzzled diet coke as he sported his new sarong and wife beater shirt, danced a Scottish jig and sang rock and roll.
His card read: It is time to grow up.
Me? I'm signing up for my own bank account.



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